Memories are powerful. For years and years, when I was out driving, if I heard a siren, tears would gush down my cheeks. When my son played the saxophone in the school band, we would go to his performances. Whenever I heard the drums, more tears would start flowing controllably. That’s how it was. It must have been from my childhood memories of the German military marches and sirens.
Those tears clearly came from a deeply subconscious place as I had no awareness of sadness or fear. Then in my mid-60s, I was driving and a firetruck went by, sirens roaring, but no tears came. Just like that, I was healed. As a therapist, I was astonished. I thought it was really interesting that it can happen. Not everyone heals though. My mother had nightmares about the Germans and the Gestapo right up to the end. She never got over it. She never healed.
Why do some people heal and others not? The reasons vary. Some people tend to be more resilient and optimistic than others. You’ve experienced these people. They always have a smile on their face, have a kind word for a friend or family member, are thoughtful, kind, considerate and generous. They see the glass as “half-full” not “half-empty”. Others, are more pessimistic with a victim mentality. They hold on to pain and suffering. In fact, they may even think they deserve to be in the situation they’re in.
Healing comes from making peace with others or with a situation. It comes from ability of acceptance and the willingness to let go.